Essays in Idleness

For several years I have not written a single cat-blog, notwithstanding that is what one does in media to please sentimental readers. My failure to write cat-blogs may perhaps be blamed for my declining fortune. But I don’t own a cat to inspire me, for fear that it might “eat me out of house and home.” Cats, I have noticed, are among the most eager carnivores.

Thanks to the BBC, however, I can now consult the zoo in Aalborg, Denmark, which houses and homes plenty of cats, including lions, tigers, leopards, and lynx. But it, too, has the problem of voracious appetites, compounded in the case of these cats by their low-carbohydrate diets. Moreover, they are in competition for donations against many other worthy causes. The zoo is currently appealing to the public for help.

Donations of family pets are now invited. They already mention receiving live chickens, rabbits, guinea pigs, &c — though I would guess there is more meat on a pampered house-cat. Horse contributions earn a tax benefit. All are put in the service of nature (red in tooth and claw!), which has integral plans for disposing of feathers and fur. The only unnatural thing the zoological authorities do is to medically euthanize these pets, before tossing them into the feeding cages. For they are sentimental, too.